Another milestone in his military career

Today my best friend and love of my life graduates his AIT class.

It’s bittersweet for me really. We have been together for 5 and a half years while we have been friends for 6 years. During those 6 years I have missed every single major thing in his career. I missed when he left on deployment and came back (in my defense he was trying to date me, I wanted nothing to do with him, and it wasn’t supposed to evolve into a relationship); I missed when he graduated A school as an MA (Master at Arms in the Navy; in plain English “cop”) because I was 38 weeks pregnant with Monkey in San Diego and he was at Lackland AFB. I missed his promotion; that was at A school as well. I missed him swearing into the Army; I was working and couldn’t get the day off to drive to MEPS that was 4.5 hours away. I missed him graduating the Army’s WTC (Warrior Transition Course); because it was on December 16^th and he was coming home the next day for Christmas Exodus so with it being so close to Christmas we decided I’d stay home with the kids and use the money on presents. And now here we are at AIT, he’s there and I’m here. We just couldn’t swing it since the Army messed up the pay in January by counting him AWOL (absent without leave) while he was there in class. I just love how they are quick to yank that money away but will move slower than a turtle in molasses to give it back.

A part is jealous that his aunt and uncle will be there to witness it but I have to remind myself of the bigger picture. Getting the kids and myself to him as fast as possible and putting this family back together again. If I miss another moment in his career I am going to keel over and push the daisies up. He tells me all the time it’s okay, he understands; but I worry that he doesn’t feel a bit let down when other wives and family are there. All I can do is constantly remind him how proud I am, how much I love him, and how fast I’m working on us getting to him. 

Walking to purchase regrets to exhusbands to the Wicked Witch

Last Wednesday I posted a picture of a new chapter in our lives with the Princess. She literally “walked” for about a day, since then she has been speed racing throughout the house. She reminds me of Forrest Gump in a way. Remember the scene where Forrest Gump is running away from the mean boys on the dirt road and they do a progression shot showing his legs from hobbling with braces, to them breaking off, to full grown legs? That’s how I feel with her and before I know she will be running around the house with me yelling behind her “Don’t run”.  It’s such a bittersweet moment of life. We as parents always are eager for the next stage in development, if there is actually a parent out there who doesn’t look forward then I’m sorry just haven’t met one yet. We push and anticipate for the next stage, then it happens and we are left feeling sad. Almost like the “empty nest” syndrome, longing for the rewind button to go back.  Yesterday The Man was able to see her walk via webcam! It was so awesome, she kept yelling at him and clapping. Too bad we couldn’t hear each other, another thing on my list to fix; my laptop.

I have to adjust my level of awareness with her now. It’s been a learning curve with her. Monkey learned the hard way to not leave his food unattended on the table. Otherwise Princess will give herself a bath in frosted corn flakes and ice cold milk. She can now climb the baby gate as well when it’s blocking her path to the endless supply of “baby yummies” aka the dog food. I have yet to understand the kids desire to eat dog food. It’s nasty. I also discovered that the incense oil that has been on my window sill for the last year is no longer safe. Along with when spilled on said window sill that the paint will bubble AND the wall will forever smell of spiced pumpkin. I liked the smell for the first 5 minutes, now I refuse to sit in the recliner near the wall. It’s over powering and just horrible. Another scent that I truly don’t know what was going through my head when I bought it thinking “oh it smells lovely”. Yeah it did, IN the store. Everything is always better in the store! Then you get home with it and it’s not even close to what you thought it would be. Just like buying clothes. They make you look super skinny and flattering in the dressing room, get home and you look like a huge balloon puppet. But ya already threw the tags away and now you’re stuck with it.

As you can probably see my mind is FAR from staying on track today. I have so much swimming around up there. I need some nets to corner it all so I can pick which one I want to deal with. I want to start moving, but I can’t till the ex-husband agrees. I have sent him two emails both with revised visitation plan that will work out in his favor but of course I won’t hear from him till it’s on his time schedule. I really am trying to grow past being so angry with him, I mean shoot we’ve been divorced for 6 years now; but honestly he is the ONE person in my life who brings me to the point of going to jail for life. It’s a constant struggle to keep growing up with him. I. Am. Trying. That’s really all I can say about that. I just have to wait it out, until then I can’t plan anything. I feel like a boat stuck in the middle of a lake, The Man on the shore calling me to hurry and come over but I can’t because I’m waiting for the other oar to row and my ex has that oar. *insert foot tapping and labored breathing* Enough of that subject before I have a heart attack.

Maybe I should make Tuesdays my ramble days, wherever the thought river flows you go. I kinda like that idea. Why yes, yes I do. and in the midst of this thinking I just burnt my tongue on my coffee. I can feel my taste buds curling up, whithering away, like the Wicked Witch as she's melting. I have GOT to get a handle on my thoughts today. 

A year in cloth diapers

In 2 weeks we will have a new milestone under our belts. The Princess will have been in cloth diapers for a year. Over the year I have come across many different perseptions people have placed upon the cloth diapering concept. Some have been great and others have lead me to bite my tongue holding back tears.

Three years ago I toyed with the idea of doing this with Monkey but I didn't know much about it and was under the impression I was going to have to make them myself. Now I can sew but I can't follow a pattern, sew a straight line, or have anything come out presentable. My crafty skills look more like a kindergartner that was given a Monster and let to run loose in DisneyLand. I chucked the idea out the window and went with my ever trusted Pampers.

A little while later we were pregnant again and I toyed with the idea some more. The Man just rolled his eyes and wouldn't put much heart into the discussion because like a lot of things, I get these great ideas and plans but they fizzle out just as quickly as they appeared. Then the last week of December 2008 I decided to take the plunge. I wanted to do it. I wanted to try. With it being right after Christmas we didn't have much cash flow left so I started simple. Ordered..
dozen preemie unbleached Indian prefolds from Little Lions
a dozen hand dyed infant prefolds from another mama
3 Snappis

Of course had to get some covers and being clueless I tried a couple different brands:
Bummis Super Whisper Wraps
Thirsties
Proraps
Wiggle Worm Bottoms (absolutely has adorable fabric prints_

And for bed time:

6 Kissaluvs size 0

Upon arrival before her debut, the nerves and doubts crept in. Could I do this? How in the world do you fold the prefolds? What am I doing? This is going to be a disastour! But I convinced myself I could do this, whether it was doing it for her or for me I still wasn't sure.

We weren't in the hospital for a full day, the moment we got home I tried a preemie prefold. Oh man was I nervous. It fit her pefectly and then it hit me. The infant ones were way too big for this little 4lb 12 oz baby. Panic started to creep in, I quickly ordered some more and kept trucking. I haven't looked back once.

In the year we have used a couple disposables here there, like our move from San Diego to Oregon; wait that was it. No way I was going to do cloth on an 19 hour drive during that time. We have gone through different diapers, found ones that we like, love, and can't stand. We've gone from solely prefolds, to a combination of prefolds and fitted, to mainly fitteds and pockets; and now here we are with fitteds, prefolds and wool.

Likes
Nanipoos (too bad she isn't making anymore)
Goodmamas
FuzziBunz
Bumgenius

Hated
Mutts (absolutely adorable prints, just way too thin to be absorbant for a super wetter)

Loved
Bagshot Rainbamboo
Scuttlebutts
Piddle Poddles

And last month I found the wool love. I promised myself I would never get sucked into this crazy. However everyone around seemed to be liking it, it's always cold in the house, and they were just too adorable. Couldn't be happier with this new plunge I've taken.

I can honestly say that I am beyond ecstatic that we've gone a year in cloth, that I haven't fizzled in my love for cloth, and have let no one's rude comments change my choice for using cloth.


♥ ♥ A Muddy PAW ♥ ♥