Not Me! Monday

Rules are rules. I do not care the circumstances, you stick to them. Okay well MAYBE rules are meant for everyone else to follow but not for me when I choose not to follow them. But that doesn’t matter right now. Because when I set a rule for the kids, I expect Dirt Diver and them to follow them. I was so excited to see Avatar, because even though we own the movie for the past month I haven’t seen it. Upon making dinner, Dirt Diver didn’t say everyone could eat in the living room near my brand new couch! I in turn did NOT raise a stink and then would never prove how incredibly stubborn I am; would sit at the table by myself eating my dinner. I did not throw a silent temper tantrum that last until the next morning by cleaning up after myself and going straight to bed at 1830. I did not turn the TV off in my room each time the bedroom door knob started to turn. I did not watch 4 hours of TV on closed caption just to make them think I went to bed. I would never in a million years throw the silent treatment like that. Nope because I am a mature adult who has rational conversations with her family. I also did not mutter under my breathe a couple times what a asshole Dirt Diver was being and when asked what I had said, reply with “I was going over my grocery list in my head”. Never ever EVER would I be that person.

Saturday upon waking up and getting ready for a day out with the family, I would never do the most stupidest thing ever. I would not allow for our family to get excited to do the Kentucky Whiskey tour, do the drive, only to get there and then not have my ID. I would not then beg Dirt Diver to sneak me samples of the whiskey only to be shot down. I would not have to listen to the kids laugh and roll their eyes because mom can’t ever remember her wallet. I did not pout because I could smell the wonderful flavors of whiskey but couldn’t taste them. We didn’t cut our tour short because of my missing ID.

At the flea market, I would not show my immaturity but bursting into a fit of giggles and points as we walked past a booth openly selling “water bongs”. I did not keep myself contained each and every time we walked past them. I did not find it hilarious that ‘Tater knew what they were and burst out into laughter as she said “holy cow they can’t even hide it here dad”. I love my kid and her honesty about life sometimes.

I also did not find that people watching in Kentucky at a flea market to be absolutely the greatest thing EVER! It’s better then watching at Fashion Valley Mall in San Diego where all the rich, high and toity spoiled brats go to flaunt their body parts.

I did not spend Saturday night rolling my eyes as Dirt Diver and our neighbor’s husband turned a silly basketball game into a drinking game. Nor did I burst out laughing at Dirt Diver as he realized he was going to puke after trying to do 4 slam dunks in a row followed by 2 corn dogs, and a huge glass of Jack and Pepsi. I would NEVER be that cruel and laugh at his self inflicted pain.

Really I am a very loving person would NEVER in a million years poke fun of others, result to childish silent treatments, nor would ever make fun of people who are loosing their hair but can maintain a mullet while wearing overalls from the 60’s that are 5 inches too short and being held together with the dirt from the 60’s. Never ever would I be that person.

How was your week ladies? I know I’m behind on reading and commenting and I apologize. This is my last week of training and I am trying desperately to get this house set up.