If you open your mouth be prepared to accept what follows

29 June 2010

One thing I can not stand is lack of information being passed down. Drives me batty. When Dirt Diver was in the Navy on the ship the Ombudsman was nonexistent. Then he went to shore duty and we had NO one. I had to rely on my friends to pass down information regarding activities, opportunities, etc. It was really annoying and could be down right lonely at times. Especially when you live no where near the Post and have to rely on your absent minded husband to pass stuff down. We made the transition to the Army and all I’ve heard is good and bad about the Family Readiness Group aka FRG. I choose to take the negative and brush it aside. Sadly in the almost 3 months I’ve lived here, I’ve had no interaction with them at all. 3 meetings that I was never told of. 2 fund raisers that were never mentioned. There is a Family Day this Thursday and sadly I didn’t receive information about it till last night.  I was fuming at this point. Kinda like the mad women folding laundry talking to herself while dropping the F-bomb.

After Dirt Diver threatening to lock himself in the bedroom again if I don’t shut up, I sat down and wrote the FRG leader an email. Actually had to write it twice so it wouldn’t come out rude and attackful. Waited nervously for her reply and then there it was with more then I bargained for. Through the course of 5 email exchanges last night, I have either stupidly volunteered or been voluntold to write the FRG newsletter. I seriously do not remember falling and hitting my head yesterday to volunteer myself. I did have a beer but one beer has no affect on me let alone make me volunteer to write a newsletter that I have no clue about. Then I reread our emails this morning and realized that she is trying to rope me in as her Co-Leader. I about died. Really? She’s trying to rope in this disorganized out of control crazy lady? Oy Veigh.

Right now I am sitting here trying to decide if I should just take on this responsibility of the newsletter or push it back on her plate. Part of me feels bad. It’s a fairly new FRG as in started January/February 2010. Half our men have been moved from Bravo to Alpha. We’re supposed to get more men but the great thing of the Army… Who knows when. We are dealing with an upcoming deployment and I have ALWAYS been a huge supporter of FRG/KV/Ombudsman being active during deployment to keep spouses spirits up. The other part of me feels like I’d be a hypocrite to feel that way but back down from a challenge like this. A challenge to be of use to other spouses, a challenge that in the end will allow me to be selfish by giving me something to do while he is deployed to help pass the time.

Guessing I’ve pretty much answered my own question. I will take on this challenge. I will learn my husband’s unit and I will do my best to not let my craziness seep into this adventure. *snicker* Okay who am I lying to? We all know you can’t hide crazy.

Now I am calling upon my Milspouse blogger friends! Do you have newsletters for your FRG? What is / has been included in yours? What would you like to see included?  Someone throw me a life preserver here!

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8 Voices:

To the Nth said...

I know all about accidental self-volunteering, so I feel your pain! I bet you'll do a great job, though. You can always start out by writing the newsletter for yourself: the articles you'd like to see, the information you wish had been distributed to you, the upcoming events you feel everyone should know about. After you churn out a few issues, I bet you'll get some feedback -- at which point you can thank the feedback-giver for volunteering to write an article for you. ;-)

Renee said...

The best way to know what's going on is to get involved! I became the co-leader and then leader for our FRG. We were in the unit a whole year before I was ever contacted or knew that there was and FRG. The FRG leader was a dimwhit who left a bad taste in everyone's mouth. I took over in Jan '10 - I just could depend on her to provide me with information I would need for the deployment. Now I make sure to contact the deployed's families and send out email and snail mail communications. We don't have a newsletter (I do have examples if you need them) but I've created a vFRG website to get information out there too. Good luck!

Mary Teresa said...

Hey I have never actually commented (I'm a stalker I admit it ;D) But this is a topic close to my heart. I am the FRG leader for our slightly disfunctional unit. I would say that A) I understand what your leader is going through and "finding" new spouses isn't always easy, at least for me. The unit is supposed to provide info (doesn't happen) and often times the sponsor is less than helpful at attempts to reach you through him. No excuses, but she's human too and doing a full time job without getting paid generally without too much support and often times being attacked personally for failure of the FRG. I commend you for reaching out to her (and rewriting your e-mail so it wasn't mean,) and think that writing the newsletter will both help to take one thing off her plate so that she can address other issues and allow you to see some of the behind the scenes chaos that makes her job hard. All that being said, if you want an example of a newsletter, let me know and I can send you ours. My Editor did an AWESOME job on it and I am so thankful for her help, as I'm sure your leader will be thankful for yours. That's all. I think I should have put in paragraphs for all my verbal vomit. I hope your FRG experience gets better, I know that it's a thankless job to be involved in.

mannadonn said...

I was actually the FRG leader for our company for a year then did the newsletter for several months. I might still have some on my computer if you want me to email them to you for ideas??

You can do a family spotlight, like interview a different family each month and have them featured so you get to know one another.

I can also tell you that the reason she jumped at the change to "rope" you into these positions is because you are probably one of the ONLY people who have stepped forward and said anything. You CARED enough to be angry and that's a great trait to have.

I believe the FRG is what the spouses make of it. If they all take the negative and brush it off, it will never get better. The FRG I ran was amazing. 2 years later people STILL talk about the way the FRG was then. If you have any questions at all, please feel free to ask, I would love to help in any way I can!

amuddypaw said...

I like that thought of trying to write it for myself. I never thought of it from that angle. And I hope that as each one goes out that I will be better educated on our unit and so will everyone else. Great idea.

amuddypaw said...

We have the vFRG site but it's collecting dust. The last update on it was back in February when they were first moving from Hood to Knox. Hopefully with the newsletter and getting a better staff on FRG we can turn it around to make it awesome for deployment.

amuddypaw said...

I have a stalker? *HUGETOOFIEGRIN* I feel so special, if you were here, I'd pounce ya like Tigger to hug ya. *snicker*

I totally get what you mean. I did KV with my first husband and MAN did that put a sour taste in my mouth for so long. It's gone thankfully and I am truly looking forward to getting involved. I know it's going to take a while to get where she has a vision for it but since I like a challenge I am up for it.

After all the years of volunteering for KV, Cheerleading, Church, Softball, and Girl Scouts; I have learned the nasty side of putting yourself out there for "free". It's amazing how people feel they can just take advantage. CRAZY.

I've got your page lady, I'll be your stalker now too.

amuddypaw said...

I have committed to the newsletter. The more I thought it bout it yesterday the more I felt like I was a hypocrite for wanting more from the FRG but not wanting to put the time in. I used to be a KV and those 4 years had good and bad times. In the end though, being able to stand back and enjoy seeing my hard work pay off and put smiles on others made it all worth the crazy wives would call and unload all their marriage problems on you. lol

I have already recruited Dirt Diver into finding a couple guys in the company so I can spotlight them and ask them some random questions. Already wrote an article for it for back to school reminder tips as well since the newsletter won't be published till August 1st and school starts back on the 2nd. Now I just need to get with her and start finding out who our chaplain is and whatnot to try and get some stuff put in there.

My minds a turning now! I'd love to see what you had. My email is a.muddy.paw@gmail.com


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