Beauty regimen that I can do with out

Why must Piggies like putting things in her hair?

Don't mean hair gel or even bows.

No that would be TOO simple right?

Instead she has an OBSESSION with putting hand soap on her hair. (read more)

Kids, chores and my patience

Why must kids who have chores do them half way?

They don't like being yelled at, scolded, or even punished for not completing them properly,

 but yet they continue to do them wrong.

And then argue that they were doing it right and I'm wrong.

(if you're reading in Reader don't forget to click to read the rest)

More Adventures in Potty Training

After months of stressing over it, I think it’s safe to say that Piggies has finally gotten the hang of potty training. It wasn’t even as close to as bad as it was when Monkey started. 

(And before I forget Princess has now been dubbed Piggies around the house since in order for her to not be sporting an afro, I HAVE to put her in pig tails. Hence the nickname Piggies)

I mean there is still progress to be made like sleeping the night without a diaper/pull-up.

But we are getting there!

The first month was a huge hit and miss mess. I have to admit for once in my life I was so incredibly grateful for having hardwood floors quickly.

Second month we just stopped trying because she made it VERY clear she wanted nothing to do with it. And I absolutely REFUSE to push any child into potty training when they are adamant about not wanting to try it.

Then the past month and a half she has been doing absolutely amazing. Well when we are home that is. When she was really sick I truly wished she would give up and let me diaper her tush up but even sick as a dog she refused and would run to the bathroom every other second of her day. 

She CAN make it through nap time without a pull-up so that's another positive step. 

Here's couple things I’ve learned with her on this adventure:

-          Never EVER be embarrassed to bring her potty chair with you. Always throw it in the back of the truck. Ya just never know when you're going to need it, like on the side of the road on the highway.

-          Don’t worry about anyone being in your way when you have to pick her up, cradling her like a football as you run through a crowded Walmart/Commissary knocking over people to get her to the bathroom in time.

-          When you can’t find those favorite jeans for her to wear and realize they are in the diaper bag make sure to toss an EXTRA set in the bag so she doesn’t have to bowl naked.

-          Do not trust your 4 yr old to bring the 2 yr old toilet paper because they WILL clog your toilet

-          Do not teach your child to help carry the pee to the toilet because they WILL get over excited thinking they are a big kid, pick up the little pee holder and without meaning to, swing it around to show you covering you, the dog, and your flat screen in yupp you guessed it... PEE!

Those are really just a couple of helpful hints that I’ve picked up and they seem to be helping as we make progress on this journey.


What are some of your less then glorious lessons learned during this adventure?

Thank goodness pillows can take the punches

It's never a full day until something happens bringing me to the verge of tears while standing in public. Yesterday was just a busy day. Dish Network came and took forever to hook up all 4 rooms. Not his fault in the least, more the old house's fault. Poor guy spent almost 3 hours with Monkey following him asking him the ever infamous "why" question to everything. Then we had maintenance come and fix the toilet yet again. We've been here 7 days and I've had to have the master toilet fixed almost every single day including a midnight emergency call. As he was here I was bitching to my neighbor about having to venture out in town to find Home Depot (there's a Lowe's too but I prefer the HD) for a dryer cord; the guy goes out to his truck and comes back handing me the 4 prong power cord that I need. I about hugged the guy; he saved me $25. We still ventured out because of course we didn't have the tools.

On the way back to Post at a red light Monkey sees a Harley next to us. OMG I was drooling at the bike, Harley's in general make me giddy, I can't wait till we can own one. There we are windows down and Monkey's in the back seat yelling "hey guy hey guy I love your bike. Give it to me please?" The guy on the Harley couldn't stop laughing and just told Monkey to make sure his first ride is a Harley. They chatted while the light took forever, honestly the light took so long you could have made an omelet.

Pick up the older kids and that's when I felt myself crash as the older kids bickering eating away at what was left of my patience (do they EVER get along?). Princess is cranky and Monkey is whinny. We run to the commissary to grab dinner and that is when we all fell apart at the check-out. Yes I became THAT parent. Ya know the ones you see at the store where her kids are running circles around her and you are thinking to yourself "She needs to give those kids a firm spanking" or "Holy CRAP if my kids acted like that I would never let them leave the house". There I stood at the self check out, Princess in my arms crying, Monkey's trying to climb up my leg and onto the check stand, Lil t' keeps leaning on the checkout after I repeatedly tell him to get off so I can scan my crap, and 'Tater is rambling and rambling to the point my ear was hanging on by a single tendon.

And that is when it happened.

I went to scan a bag of taco seasoned rice right as Princess grabbed it and it ripped in half. Rice and seasoning flew up, Princess broke into a scream and there I was holding back tears as I realized that I now smelt like a taco and had rice in my hair, down my shirt while Lil t' burst out into laugh, and Monkey is running in circles yelling "Me Robot Me Robot!".

I managed to get checked out, everyone in the car and home in one piece. Got everyone out, grabbed a Budweiser, went into my room, closed the door, took a swig and then yelled as loud as I could into my pillow while letting the tears fall.

The rest of the night went kinda smoothly if you don't count the temper tantrum I had trying to switch out the dryer's power cord or that I brunt one pound of ground turkey while making dinner, or that upon going to bed I walked straight into a wall when I turned the hallway light off, falling to my tush.

Schemed a little schemed, payback is not YOUR friend children

There is a rule in this house, if you can pick up a fork and eat my cooking, then you can pick up a sponge and clean up after dinner.

With that said, there is not a night that doesn’t go by that doesn’t end with someone getting in trouble for flinging dirty dish water across the kitchen, breaking a glass because they are too impatient to put it away right, half washed dishes put away with food still stuck to them clear as day. Actually I think that is my favorite way they do the clean up. I just LOVE getting a glass out, pouring ice cold milk in it, sitting down to eat my food, take a drink and discover as I’m in mid gulp that the remnants from another nights dinner has made its’ way inside my cup and is now crusted on. I am just a HAPPY mommy when that happens. The Man though, oh you’d think that someone had just committed murder right there on the table while we were eating when it happens to him.

Or I love it when one kid, usually ‘Tater, decides that they are going to sing a song horribly off key, purposely forgetting words, and increases their volume each time the other protests. (Seriously NO clue where they get this increase the volume tendencies either) I have even heard farm animal noises waft from the kitchen followed by either more outrageous singing or huge grunts that put a dog trying to pass a shoe to shame, sadly the animal noises and grunts is usually Lil t’.

These antics always end up in the same way EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT. Me threatening to cut them off from everything sacred to them; the TV, cell phone, video games, library books, friends, and sadly they usually respond with “well you can’t take our imagination away”. At this point I say a silent prayer asking the Lord to please grant my loving beautiful children with a child themselves that will say these kind, sweet, sensitive words to them.

Now as a loving and devoted mother, who puts her children’s needs before her own, who NEVER gets tired, stressed, angry, or upset at them. A mother who has never yelled “O.M.G. You really irritate the piss out of me and my ears are shutting down now”. A mother who never drops the “F Bomb” as she slams the lid on the washer because she has hit her breaking point. A mother who never yells from another room to knock it off rather than go into the kitchen to assist with the problems. I take full control of this situation. I have schemed a little scheme. I am going to save their dirty plates, forks, cups, bowls and the next time I serve dinner, they will get to eat off their own handy work. The more I think of it, the more I feel it’s only fair. If they expect me to eat off half washed dishes then they should eat off them too. I WILL be on the lookout this week for their nasties because I am so ready to serve justice. Let’s see how Mr. Imagination will handle this when he comes face to face with it.

With that I tried a new recipe this week. The original looked a little dull to me, so I changed it up a little.

**This picture does NO justice to the dish especially since they are trying to kill me with the olives, but since my camera picks when it wants to work I found one thanks to Google**

Nacho Casserole

1lb. ground beef (we use only ground turkey)
1 ½ c chunky salsa (I just poured till the smell was strong)
Corn to your desire
¾ c. Miracle Whip (YES I am that person that LOVES my Miracle Whip)
Burrito Seasoning Packet
2 c. crushed tortilla chips
2 c. shredded cheese (I actually found a Colby mixture that had jalapenos peppers in it that scared the tar out of me. Another story for another time)

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2. Brown the meat w/ seasoning packet. Since I use turkey and it really only has excess water, I always put the seasoning packet in with the turkey, but if you use regular beef, you’ll want to brown, drain then add the packet. Remove from heat, pour into bowl and add salsa, corn, and Miracle Whip. Stir.
3. In a 2 quart casserole dish, layer meat mixture, tortilla chips, and cheese twice. End with cheese on top.
4. Bake for 20 - 30 minutes uncovered. It will depend on the type of dish you use. I used my all time favorite Pyrex dish and it took about 23 min, however if I were to use my stoneware dish it would probably take about 45 minutes.
5. Serve with shredded lettuce, diced tomatoes, and sour cream.